For Survivors
If you are being hurt, the University of Michigan offers safe, confidential places for you to turn for help. If you are an employee, call the Faculty and Staff Assistance Program at 734-936-8660 or, if you work in the U-M Health System, contact the UMHS Employee Assistance Program at 734-763-5409. If you are a student or staff or faculty member, you can call the Sexual Assault Prevention and Awareness Center at their business line 734-998-9368 or their confidential 24-hour crisis line at 734-936-3333. These confidential resources will connect you with relevant local resources and will help you make decisions about your safety.
If you are not ready or able to contact the university, you may find it helpful to develop a safety plan for yourself. Whether you are planning to leave the relationship or not, there are ways to increase your safety. You may be at an increased risk of violence when you attempt to leave, and it is important to consider the information below. You are the best person to decide whether a particular step will increase or decrease your danger.
When you are planning to leave or have left an abusive relationship, you might take the following steps:
- Vary routes to and from work or childcare so the batterer cannot follow you home or to work.
- If it will increase your safety, get a restraining or stalking order, always carry it, and give a copy to your employer. Ask them to enforce it. Find out about your legal rights as a survivor.
- Ask the employer to take steps to keep the batterer away. This may include moving you to a new work location, enforcing a restraining order, creating a no-trespass order, or screening phone calls.
- Park in a different, but close location.
- If there are security guards on site, ask them to keep an eye out for the batterer and let you know if they see him/her.
- Prepare a "Flight Kit" which includes money, documents, important papers, and extra car keys and clothes, and keep it in a safe place.
- Develop a plan for yourself and your children on how to get out of a dangerous situation.
- Change your bank account and direct deposit for wages.
- Make copies of your children's birth certificates and other important papers.
- Call a shelter for assistance in locating resources, getting support and keeping safe.
When planning to stay in an abusive relationship, at least for now, you might take the following steps:
- Pay attention to signs or behaviors that warn when an assault will occur, and leave if possible. If leaving is not possible, move to a room with an outside exit, and avoid bathrooms and kitchens or other rooms where there are hard surfaces or where weapons are kept.
- Call 911 if possible.
- Ask neighbors to call the police if they hear cries for help, yelling, or loud noises.
- Change the locks if the batterer moves out.
- Make sure your children know what to do in order to stay or be safe if violence occurs. For example, they can go to the neighbors, call 911, or hide.
- Learn what resources and options are available if you need to leave in a hurry (call shelters, crisis lines, talk to friends or family).
- Remember that batterers can follow you on your home computer, even if you are careful about deleting things. Learn more about internet protection.
If you are an immigrant, there are other factors to consider when thinking about your safety or the safety of your children. Read about your rights as an immigrant.
